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united nations of kate

if you follow me on twitter [and you probably shouldn't], you may have seen this tweet earlier:

tree. arbre. arból. baum. medis. kasht. zuhaitz.

the most embarrassing thing about this is not that i felt it necessary to advertise that i talk to myself, but that i'm dead certain that i can say the word "tree" in more than seven languages, but went with the ones that i could remember off the top of my overstuffed head. [seriously, the inside of my skull probably looks like some hoarder nightmare. tonnes of stuff, but there's no way of finding any of it when you need it.]

of course, there are things that i have learned to say besides "tree" in other languages. i've been documenting my adventures in language learning this year, where i've basically been working towards becoming a one-woman united nations meeting. of course, if you've seen some of my social media posts, you'll be aware that my general assembly would appear to be discussing some pretty dubious subjects.

here is the dutch delegation, clearly negotiating the terms of a business deal:

some things are deal breakers

and here is the dutch delegation doing nothing to dispel the idea that their country has a racism problem:

worst red carpet hosts ever

here is the spanish delegation congratulating themselves on their fine sartorial choices:

aren't they always?

and from the sounds of it, their architecture is pretty amazing:

picasso would be proud

the italian contingent has a leader who isn't quite so advanced:

maybe he brought the rhinoceros for the dutch

the outside world is a little confusing for him:

no, but your friends are

the french have some slightly macabre gifts in their designer bags:

you probably don't want to make any more jokes about them losing wars


and the germans just seem a little ashamed of the people they've sent as their representatives:

i hope they washed their hands

i think that some of the parties might need to work a little bit on their public demeanour: 

jesus, germany, go talk to spain about their pants

but some are willing to do their bit to solve the problem:

give them to germany or you don't get any rhinoceros

[my favourite part of that last one is that it uses the formal "you".]

my internal u.n. is currently eurocentric, which i aim to change in the future [once everyone has pants, or at least a sarong]. but more seriously, i hope this helps you all appreciate just how much fun it will be to talk to me in other languages. as it turns out, it's probably going to be a lot like talking to me in english. 

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