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mental health mondays :: alarming

we have a huge mental health problem. it can be solved and that will take work on a lot of different fronts. people are killing themselves in astounding numbers. people are killing themselves at a greater rate than at any time in the last twenty years and the situation is getting worse. relationship problems, financial struggles and [or course] mental health issues all contribute to the staggering rise, along with a number of other factors. there are no rules about who kills themselves, although there are some groups where the risk is higher.

improving mental health care, reducing the desperation that financial struggles can cause, and finding effective ways to deal with problems like substance abuse take time because they require larger scale action, but relationship-building is something that is built from the ground up. so while we're all calling for change on a larger scale, it is at least somewhat mollifying to know that we can do some things that make a difference without having to wait.

two celebrity suicides in the last week, two people who seemed to be winning their battles with bipolar disorder and addiction have come as a shock and, for those with mental health issues, such stories are immensely frightening. when i talk to people about my own past urges, i liken suicidal thoughts to have a snippet of a song stuck in your head: they seem inconsequential or annoying at first, but then build until it feels like a cement truck parked on your head. a dark thought enters and rattles around and it seems like something that you can control, but when you're ill, the balance of power tips quickly and you realize too late that you don't have a way of just expelling it, that you can't assert control over your own thoughts. that evil little thing can stay in your brain for weeks or months, or it can overwhelm you in a matter of hours and there is very little protection when that happens. even for the wealthy. even for those in a happy relationship. even for the privileged.

many, many people in my extended network have posted on social media virtually begging people to reach out to them if they are feeling suicidal or depressed. others have plaintively responded by stating the sad truth that the more depressed a person is, the less likely they are to reach out. the key then seems to be making honest, meaningful communication the standard for those we care about.  so that "reaching out" is just what happens on an ongoing basis, from both sides.

reach out when you're panicky and desperate. reach out when you're worried about someone and want to do anything you can to help. those are both important things. but even more important is reaching out just to make a connection that can let you can grab hold of when you're dangling. and be choosy. none of us have the time and energy we'd like to help and support others. making judgments is necessary and most of us will make mistakes on that front. that's not a reason to stop trying.

this is a suicide risk assessment checklist. it's used by medical professionals but, for once, you don't need to be a professional to use it. just keep it on hand. look at it. think about who you know who meets the criteria for either the long- or short-term group. think about how you relate to the descriptions. are you drifting? is someone you care about? you don't need to quiz anyone about their state of mind to know how at risk they are. and it can only help if we all just get used to trying to recognize the signs as part of our regular interactions with each other.

p.s. :: i've seen a few instances of people getting upset at others for not placing content or trigger warnings on posts about suicide. please, please, please don't do this. one of the major components of the battle against mental illness and suicide is that they are so heavily stigmatized, that getting people to talk about such things is incredibly difficult. demanding that people issue warning statements before bringing up the subject reinforces the idea that suicide is something that people should feel wary of discussing because it makes others upset. i know that that isn't the intention. i know that people post vile, ignorant, stupid things about suicide and mental illness because they want to seem shocking or rebellious. those people are pathetic and deserve your scorn. suicide needs to be discussed, without guilt and that isn't happening because it's upsetting. please.  


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dj kali & mr. dna @ casa del popolo post-punk night

last night was a blast! a big thank you to dj tyg for letting us guest star on her monthly night, because we had a great time. my set was a little more reminiscent of the sets that i used to do at katacombes [i.e., less prone to strange meanderings than what you normally hear at the caustic lounge]. i actually invited someone to the night with the promise "don't worry, it'll be normal". which also gives you an idea of what to expect at the caustic lounge. behold my marketing genius.

mr. dna started off putting the "punk" into the night [which i think technically means i was responsible for the post, which doesn't sound quite so exciting]. i'd say that he definitely had the edge in the bouncy energy department.

many thanks to those who stopped in throughout the night to share in the tunes, the booze and the remarkably tasty nachos and a special thank you to the ska boss who stuck it out until the end of the night and gave our weary bones a ride home…

making faces :: je vois la vie en rose

you may have heard that some enterprising but probably not too bright folk started a fundraising campaign to push kylie jenner over the one billion dollar net worth threshold after forbes magazine touted her as the woman poised to become america's youngest ever self-made billionaire. the idea that there are people out there who can think of nothing better to do with their money than hand it over to someone who already has way more money than she could ever need is pretty gross if you think about it, which you probably shouldn't. and that's before you even take into account that jenner isn't self-made by any honest definition of the term: she comes from a family who already had billions, who then made millions if not billions more because of a television show that followed them around doing their billionaire things. she always had lots of money to spend on building a cosmetic line, and her presence on reality television gives her a massive built-in marketing platform. t…

friday favourites 20.07.12

i was almost going to skip it this week. not out of any disinterest, but i always feel weird posting something flip and cheeky on days when the news is choked with stories of some location filled with people going about their lives suddenly getting shot up by a lone maniac with some sort of personal gripe or agenda.

awful things happen every single day. people who lead otherwise normal lives are suddenly transformed through violence every single day. by the harsh standards of the world, what happened last night in aurora, colorado isn't even close to the worst. i'm sure families in syria would consider a day where ten people died to be better than average. but there is something about these completely random mass shootings in otherwise fairly peaceful places that haunts us all here in the western world. it happened today with aurora. it happened a year ago sunday in norway. it happened in another colorado town, now synonymous with the terror of such a massacre in 1999.

what h…