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Showing posts from May, 2017

backing talkwards

so, it appears that i've finally met my linguistic match: i cannot figure out a way to learn hebrew or arabic. yes, these languages are known for being difficult for english speakers to acquire; their alphabets, vocabulary and grammar are completely alien to begin with, and on top of that, they're written backwards. ok, not backwards. the languages are written from right to left, the opposite of how english is written. [no, i take that back. far more languages are written from left to right, and in every human society, norms are designated by the majority. your languages have every right to exist, but they are fucking backwards.]

although they can be daunting at first, i'm no longer frightened of different scripts. in my limited experience, i've found that russian is easier for me to master than polish. i was lucky enough to be selected to alpha test the forthcoming japanese course from duolingo and, while i can't quite get the hang of the kanji yet, hiragana [whic…

making faces :: reviews you can't use

ah, the horror that is the limited edition. i mean, i understand why companies release products in fixed quantities, because it tends to bring in a lot of money in a very short space of time, but it can get really frustrating. some companies at least go through the planning process with an eye to keeping an item available for a season. generally speaking, i'd say that the highest-end, or so-called "prestige" brands are the best at this, not because they really want their customers to have the opportunity to feel comfortable about their purchase, but because they realise that customers are less likely to spring for a single $75 item, even if they might buy a $50 eyeshadow palette with little thought.

that intro paragraph is my way of saying "i'm sorry that i'm only reviewing this item now that it seems to be sold out everywhere".

i haven't followed kat von d's makeup releases, although she increasingly seems to be a major player in setting the c…

armchair centre back :: premier league over and under [2016-17 edition]

i did a list like this last year, offering my self-important opinion on who was rated too high and too low by fans of the english premier league. now, as i'm watching things unfold, i keep evaluating players, managers, teams and even fans on the basis of what's being said about them. am i an expert? no. but i'm an observer, so of course that gives me every right to hold forth on all my thoughts with the same confidence as someone who's been paid to play and/ or follow the sport for decades. herein lies the wonder of the game.

of course, before i get into it, i feel like i have to observe a moment of silence for my dear swans. it has not been a good couple of seasons. 2014-15 made it seem like we were ready to rise like a soap bubble to the upper level of the premier league bathtub. ok, swansea were never going to be in the upper echelons, because they just don't have that kind of money; but the past two seasons have been pretty wretched sequels to the thrill ride …