Skip to main content

a delicate balance

i'll say it: i missing my spam. since i started writing posts about things i found in my spam filter, it seems that i rarely get anything truly amusing anymore. most days, i'm just rescuing stuff that shouldn't have been snagged or skipping over boring emails that don't even have any hilariously inappropriate typos. what's a girl to do?

fortunately, i still have my spam filter at work, which doesn't see much action, but does occasionally yield a little gem like this:



Hello ha ndsome! I'm i n yovr hovse. I am fvnny a nd well-ba la nced. My photos here.

yes, that's exactly how it appears, with the exception that i put it in italics. there is a link to a site that apparently deals with mixed martial arts, which is even more perplexing. 
i guess i should find it disturbing that someone i don't know is sending me emails telling me he's in my house, but hey, he sounds friendly- no one ever tells me i'm handsome- and he says quite clearly that he's well-balanced, even stretching it out to emphasize how important it is that i understand this. so i'm sure there's nothing i need be worried about.

that said, sending people anonymous messages telling them that you're in their house is not a marketing tactic i've heard of and probably with good reason. and one could argue that following that with an assurance that you're "well-balanced" might actually cause someone to think the exact opposite. so, golfer2@gmail.com, you might want to rethink your advertising campaign.

of course, i suspect golfer2 might have flunked out of the mba program, since he's also been spotted trying to garner interest by telling people "i'm in your region. i am graceful." also "Nice t0 meet y0u ma te. I a m next t0 y0u. I a m g00dl00king. See my pics." i'm unclear on why a person would need pictures to evaluate whether someone next to them was good-looking or not. especially if i'd already met them. of course, if i hadn't met them, i'd be a little curious as to how they'd gotten my email address.

i guess i'm just a very suspicious person by nature.


Comments

Bellyhead said…
I'm going to look at your archive on Spam now! I get such a kick out of my spam email. My blog email doesn't get much except offers of money from Barclay bank, but my personal email gets all sorts of funny ones, mostly Christian dating, Jewish dating, and erection medicines. How do they know me so well?
Kate MacDonald said…
Just click the email spam tag at the end and behold the wonders of my junk filter (sorry if that sounds nasty).
Bellyhead said…
junk junk junk in your trunk?

as long as you're here, why not read more?

dj kali & mr. dna @ casa del popolo post-punk night

last night was a blast! a big thank you to dj tyg for letting us guest star on her monthly night, because we had a great time. my set was a little more reminiscent of the sets that i used to do at katacombes [i.e., less prone to strange meanderings than what you normally hear at the caustic lounge]. i actually invited someone to the night with the promise "don't worry, it'll be normal". which also gives you an idea of what to expect at the caustic lounge. behold my marketing genius.

mr. dna started off putting the "punk" into the night [which i think technically means i was responsible for the post, which doesn't sound quite so exciting]. i'd say that he definitely had the edge in the bouncy energy department.

many thanks to those who stopped in throughout the night to share in the tunes, the booze and the remarkably tasty nachos and a special thank you to the ska boss who stuck it out until the end of the night and gave our weary bones a ride home…

white trash

yes, my lovelies, i have returned from the dead, at least for the time it takes me to write this post. this is not just another piece of observational drivel about how i haven't been taking care of the blog lately, although i clearly haven't. on that front, though, the principal cause of my absence has actually been due to me trying to get another, somewhat related project, off the ground. unfortunately, that project has met with some frustrating delays which means that anyone who follows this blog [perhaps there are still a few of you who haven't entirely given up] would understandably be left with the impression that i'd simply forsaken more like space to marvel at the complexity of my own belly button lint. [it's possible you had that impression even before i disappeared.]

ok, enough with that. i have a subject i wanted to discuss with you, in the sense that i will want and encourage you to respond with questions, concerns and criticism in the comments or by em…

drive-by musings

i've written a fair bit on this blog about being a writer who waits for inspiration to strike her out of nowhere versus being a writer who puts serious work in on a daily basis and in doing so cultivates those precious lightning strikes and bottles them. i believe in and strongly encourage people to employ the latter method, as does pretty much every writer [or creative person] who is successful at this sort of thing. there have been stretches where i've been very good at this but the fact is that i slack off a lot and my brain has a tendency to grasp at multiple ideas at once without being able to relinquish any of them. basically, my brain is like someone who hasn't eaten in three days arriving at a buffet. everything looks good but the end result is that you end up with a bizarre combination of all of it that isn't nearly as satisfying as sticking to one flavour palette. [don't you dare tell me that cheese sticks go with sushi, because i will end you.]

i've…