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i'm baa-aaack!

that's right! i have a computer again and i can post things! not that i've been completely unable to post things in the last little while, but having to work either from my phone or dom's computer [with none of my files], which means that i didn't have the ability to just randomly post a photo of me clearly making simon uncomfortable.


of course, at the moment, i'm limited to sharing photos taken a year ago or more, because the one casualty of my computer failure has been that i've lost a lot of photos. always make sure your back-up works, kids. also, i'll be spending quality time putting a lot of music back on my computer.

i'm not sure how long i'll have with the computer now. if a friend told me that they had a two year old who had undergone two brain surgeries in the last year, my reaction would likely be to tell them that they should try not to get too attached. [note: i probably would say this, because i'm shockingly insensitive about this kind of thing, which is why it's probably just as well that we don't know each other personally.]

but the happy news is that i'm back. to celebrate, until march 31st you can get 20% off either the digital or "analogue" version of my book "interference" with the coupon code "VERNUM". save your money for the computer crash that will eventually infuriate you!

in the meantime, i'll be getting things back up and running like normal here and hoping that this round of brain surgery is the one that does the trick, while using the internet to source parts for my next digital child.

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jihadvertising?

i keep seeing this ad for tictac candies:



am i the only one who finds the suicide bomber clown at the end a little unnerving? all the nice natural things like the bunny and the [extinct] woolly mammoth and the fruit get devoured by a trying-to-appear-nonthreatening-but-obviously-psychotic clown who then blows himself up. congratulations, tictac, i think this ad has landed you on about a dozen watch lists.

oh and by the way, showing me that your product will somehow cause my stomach to explode in a rainbow of wtf makes me believe that doing consuming tictacs would be a worse dietary decision than the time i ate two raw eggs and a half a bottle of hot sauce on a dare.

making faces :: chanel's velvet realm

who doesn't love velvet? i know when i was younger, i used to, as george costanza longed to, "drape myself in velvet" and although that phase passed with time, i still think that the plush fabric has to be one of the high points of human achievement, up there with interior heating, advanced medicine and vodka. so to me, it's no surprise that one of the most hotly anticipated launches in the cosmetic world is chanel's new "rouge allure velvet" lipstick line, because even the name immediately makes me want to put it on my lips.

on a more concrete level, chanel describes these lipsticks as "luminous matte", which is sort of like the holy grail for lipstick lovers. we all want those intense, come-hither film noir lips, the sort where young men and sunlight are lost and never heard from again, but historically [including during the making of those films], applying a matte lipstick felt sort of like colouring in your lips with an old crayon that had…

long suffering

i've been meaning to write this post for a while, but, every time i get started, something happens that makes me rethink portions of it, to add or subtract or consider a different way of looking at things. the post was originally going to be my take on a #metoo statement, but i ended up making that post on my personal facebook page. [it's not that i don't love you all, but there are a few things i'm not comfortable putting in the entirely public sphere.] but beyond joining the #metoo juggernaut, i wanted to write something about the wave of sexual assault revelations that continues to swell over the north american media landscape that wasn't about me. then i realised that that was a little more complicated than just writing "so, lotta sex rapes happenin' these days, ain't there?" or whatever it was that i was going to say.

so i tried writing something about just a part of it: the media coverage or the entertainment industry or the politicians or …