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women who run with the cows

pretty much any trip i go on with strangers, i eventually end up getting tagged as the one who likes to spend her time with the animals. i'm ok with this, because i figure i'm likely to get tagged as eccentric anywhere and it's better that than "the one who needs heavier medication". 

on this trip, i didn't even start out being that person [the one who loves animals], because it was actually someone else who kept going on about wanting to get pictures of swiss cows with their bells, which can be heard basically everywhere in the country outside of downtown zurich and all this started because i was just pointing out to her where the cows were, which is basically everywhere, including by the side of the highway and in the neighbours' back yards. 

wild wild life

cows are completely ubiquitous in switzerland. and so is their poop. the alps are covered in cow poop. i'm working on a theory that the alps are, in fact, made of cow poop. 

i saw more of this than cheese. and there was a lot of cheese.

because the cows are allowed to wander and poop as they please, it's actually pretty easy to get close to them and i just figured why wouldn't you want to get closer if you could? 

oh, hi there

um, do i know you?
you did not just ask to borrow a cup of milk
instead of standing there, how about grabbing me a fly swatter?
actually, one of my early memories was seeing my father attacked by a cow who objected to us using their field as a picnic ground, so i think i'd have an excuse to keep my distance, but since i wanted to get close, there really wasn't a good excuse for anyone else, since there just aren't that many people with traumatic cow memories. 

and i suppose we're supposed to be cool with you people eating our relatives?

as it turns out, cows seem to like me. they were at least curious enough to come and see me and one even decided to give me a big bovine kiss on the hand, which is sort of wet and slimy and i had to keep reminding myself that it was at least theoretically adorable. 

pucker up, princess

and then i managed to electrocute my right nipple on the almost invisible fence and became "fried nipple lady", which is more original than "the one who likes to spend her time with animals", you have to admit. 

that sounded like it hurt, lady
why would you do that to yourself?

try to look the other way so she can't see us giggling...

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