Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from July, 2006

alternative dentistry

lots of people enroll in dentistry school every year for various reasons. some of them will never make good dentists because they are simply too clumsy to be trusted with the fine and intricate tools of the trade. now you know what happens to these people. (scariest part: these are pygmy hippos. they're nowhere near the size of the regular ones.)

wide load

i could probably sue the cbc, because this morning, when i heard them reporting a story about how there is a growing medical crisis because many americans are too fat to be x-rayed, i started laughing and almost drove off the road. i'm linking to the story here, because it will be much safer for you to find out about it through the safety of the internet (at least, i'm assuming you're not drriving right now).

i had already heard about the problems being faced by airlines, who are having to accomodate heavier loads in the passenger cabin, but this is a new one. it's bad enough that there are instances where the x-rays can't penetrate the fatty tissue, but can you imagine what's happening with the mri machines? pretty soon, the preparation for these is going to include the nurse spraying patients down with pam to ensure they don't get stuck.

check box mate

i am an unmarried woman who currently has a boyfriend.

i'd like you to take a few minutes to think about that because a lot of people, including the government of canada, seem to struggle to figure out what it means.

recently, i filled out the canadian census and was miffed to discover that there is no check box available for living with one's boyfriend. you are either married or you are "common law", meaning that if you're old enough to be living together it is generally assumed that you must have lapsed into a matrimonial state, because after the age of twenty, no one is comfortable with the idea that the relationship patterns you establish early on are more or less the same ones you have for the rest of your life. there is assumed to be something shameful about not being in a formally committed relationship.

my boss, for instance, struggles with what to call my boyfriend. he knows we're not married, so husband is incorrect, but he can't bring himself t…

less than supernova

despite being mired in construction, the art gallery of ontario soldiers on, continuing to offer big-name exhibits like supernova a retrospective of early- to mid-sixties works by andy warhol, curated by david cronenberg. there's a lot of potential in this, given the various talents involved, but for some reason, it just doesn't come together.

the exhibition has great focus- images of sex, death and icons exclusively, exploiting a subconscious link between all three- but the focus means that it is fairly limited in size. that doesn't bother me- i'd rather spend my time viewing fewer works in more detail- but the fact that the exhibition has been promoted so heavily means that there is a large crowd stuffed into the two rooms allotted.

it doesn't help that the museum staff seem like they are there fulfilling a community service portion of a prison sentence. "do you want these or not?" is not the way to ask someone if they would like to use the audio gui…

have a ball

a devil's ball, that is.

wladyslaw starewicz, born in what is now vilnius, lithuania (making him at once lithuanian, polish and russian) began his career a decade before walt disney began purveying the wonders of animation to the masses. although he insisted that his films were meant for children, it's hard to imagine what would result from exposing young ones to too much of the like of this.

for adults, his stop-motion films prefigure tim burton and are still technically impressive by today's standards.

business unusual

normally, when i'm sent out on assignment to the sort of place where women don't have to change their family name when they marry their husbands, the worst thing that i fear is encounters with the people who played the extras in deliverance. but i have news.

the back woods are transforming. now, when i'm sent to these places, i'm noticing more and more that the people who inhabit them look like they come out of ads for the gap. the are clean and groomed. and they all look, speak, act, dress and think exactly the same. they all have the same slightly glazed, slightly vapid, slightly dead look in their eye that betrays the lack of higher cerebral function inside.

i'm not prone to paranoia, but there is no equivalent term in the english language for a rational fear. while we aren't looking, the body snatchers have invaded. in the back woods, where we all fear to tread, a generation of clones is being bred to take over the world. they'll come for you next.

eat the cup, part 12- i will refuse

i now remember why i don't follow sports. it's not that it's anaesthetic for the masses (which it is). it's not that these events are magnets for the kind of might is right jocks who i hate (which they are). it's that, no matter what anyone says, they aren't fair. sporting events are supposed to be the apogee of fair combat- equally matched opponents fighting it out, the champion being the one who is able to marshall the skills and the wits to eke out a victory.

except that it doesn't work that way.

1. deciding games on penalty kicks is bullshit.

strangely, i've discovered that i have fairly strong opinions on this subject. if you have two teams, well-matched, they should bloody well play until somebody wins or somebody dies. everything in the course of play of the world cup final dictated a french win. even when playing a man down, they clearly outclassed their favoured opponents. with penalty kicks. you have men who are trained to score goals shoot…

brain food

amidst all the cup talk going on here, i realised that it's time for something a little more substantial. metafilter posted links today to a debate between intellectual giants noam chomsky and michel foucault.

i do agree somewhat with the comment that they fall into the trap (both in these segments and in their respective writings) of becoming almost incomprehensible, barricaded as they are behind their wall of academic bafflegab (academics would say that they are seeking language which is as precise as possible), but their arguments do shine through.

and in the age of bill o'reilly, fox news and henry rollins' new concubine, it's nice to see that the media aren't always simply conveyers of pap for the lowest common denominator.

eat the cup, part 11: fratugal

that word looks vaguely rude, i must say.

i don't know how i've avoided touching on the cuisine of a country virtually synonymous with gastronomy for the entire tournament, but tonight is france's night up, with a little help from portugal. tonight is bouillabaisse night chez kate. long one of my very favourite dishes, i chose to include not only the traditional fish, tomatoes and truckloads of garlic, but also a little bit of portuguese chorico, a few sardines and a little paprika and cloves (key flavours in their cuisine, apparently). the result is quite enjoyable, a little heavier than usual (blame the sausage) and (don't tell any famous french chefs) pretty simple to prepare.

today's ride home was surprisingly restrained. aside from a handful of chefs with michelin stars and a lot of wine, the french don't seem to have exported themselves (quebec aside) in the same way as the italians and the portuguese. (i should also add that one frenchman i met denied …

eat the cup, part 10: gertaly

and we’re back. after a weekend in new york enjoying other people’s cooking (and other people’s perspectives on the world cup, as it turns out), it occured to me that the semi-final and final rounds of the cup deserve something a little different. fusion.

so for the coming games, i am going to find ways of combining the two national cuisines of the teams playing. tonight: gertaly.

this evening’s supper featured a risotto, prepared with some onions (the basis of all italian cuisine) broth and sausage. in this case a combination of bratwurst and hot italian sausage, just to be fair. at the end, i swirled in just a little german mustard, to add a different kind of flavour. i have to say... worked out pretty well.

as increasingly happens, today’s battle was pretty epic and ended in the most dramatic fashion possible- a goal in the last minute of the last overtime period. of course, if it were a hollywood drama, the goal would have gone to the home team, so the cameras wouldn’t be force…