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diet diary

so a couple of weeks ago, i put myself on a diet. i often say that i'm watching what i eat, but it's been years since i've tried an actual, enforced diet, mostly because i lack willpower. why did i decide to give one a try now? i don't know. i haven't put on any weight in the last few months. i'd like to lose weight, of course, but i'm not nearly as neurotic about my size as i used to be. (ironically, i weigh more now than i did when i was insecure about my size.)

food, weight and our relationships with them are almost obsessive for the cast majority of adult women. statistically, up to 98% of north american women claim to be dieting or watching their weight on a regular basis, making dieting the most common non-essential activity on the continent. by adding myself to that number, at least for the time being, i'm hoping to discover what it is that drives this mania about size.

most women i know are trying, at least sporadically, to lose weight. i don't know any women who i would classify as truly overweight, so we can assume that they are not doing this for health reasons. so this is an aesthetic issue. most of them are able to specify the number of pounds they want to lose, or at least give a range, but it seems like a guess at best. no one seems to know how many pounds lost will result in the body they want. that's the tricky part. what does five pounds look like? or ten? thirty? for my part, i've told myself that i'll stop the diet when i can see a difference that makes me happy. (i don't weigh myself, the one little weight-related neurosis i have not been able to expunge. if i start stepping on the scale, i'll never get off it.)

i actually think that what i'm doing is a little trickier than a regular diet. it's easy to say that you've lost your target ten pounds, or fifteen pounds, or whatever the number in your head is. it's somewhat harder to overcome the natural body dysmorphism that's reinforced by pop culture images to find a look that makes you happy. because it involves having to say that you're happy with the way you look, something which is not encouraged.

until that happens, i'm taking the easiest diet route possible: i am limiting myself to health foods as much as possible an i am restricting my food intake. (if you want to figure out why obesity is, pardon the pun, a growing problem, have a look at the portion sizes that are offered in most restaurants. they often contain as many calories as the average person needs to consume in a day.) while i had initially planned on not counting calories, having a rough idea of how many i'm consuming is provign useful, as has finding information on my basal metabolic rate (you can enter both your current and your target weight to see how little the difference in calories needed is between them) and my body mass index (i'm within the normal range). these last two are about the only reliable pieces of information on healthy weight and diet that i've managed to track down.

and, as i mentioned at the outset, i'll also be using the opportunity to look into what it is about weight, food and appearance that drives us all so crazy. because if i'm going to be depriving myself of food, i at least want it to be a learning experience.

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as long as you're here, why not read more?

jihadvertising?

i keep seeing this ad for tictac candies:



am i the only one who finds the suicide bomber clown at the end a little unnerving? all the nice natural things like the bunny and the [extinct] woolly mammoth and the fruit get devoured by a trying-to-appear-nonthreatening-but-obviously-psychotic clown who then blows himself up. congratulations, tictac, i think this ad has landed you on about a dozen watch lists.

oh and by the way, showing me that your product will somehow cause my stomach to explode in a rainbow of wtf makes me believe that doing consuming tictacs would be a worse dietary decision than the time i ate two raw eggs and a half a bottle of hot sauce on a dare.

making faces :: hot stuff, comin' through

i don't even know what to say about the weather. the end of september saw temperatures at a scalding 36c/ 97f outside. this is especially annoying because we've had a moderate summer. most days it rained a little in the morning, the temperatures didn't creep into the 30s too often and there wasn't the normal stretch of a few weeks when it felt like we were living on the sun. now, we've receded into more normal fall weather, although it's still on the warm side for mid-october. that climate change thing is a bitch.

trying to think of something positive in the situation, it does put me in a perfect frame of mind to write about urban decay's naked heat palette. it's the latest in what appears to be an endless series of warm neutral and red eyeshadow palettes that have followed in the footsteps of anastasia's modern renaissance. [which i ultimately decided i didn't need after doing a thorough search of my considerable stash.] i do think that it'…

i agree, smedley [or, smokers totally saved our planet in 1983]

so this conversation happened [via text, so i have evidence and possibly so does the canadian government and the nsa].

dom and i were trying to settle our mutual nerves about tomorrow night's conversion screening, remembering that we've made a fine little film that people should see. which is just about exactly what dom had said when i responded thusly:

me :: i agree smedley. [pauses for a moment] did you get that here?

dom :: no?

me :: the aliens who were looking at earth and then decided it wasn't worth bothering with because people smoked even though it was bad for them?
come to think of it, that might mean that smokers prevented an alien invasion in the seventies.

dom :: what ?!?!?

me :: i've had wine and very little food. [pause] but the alien thing was real. [pause.] well, real on tv.

dom :: please eat something.

of course, i was wrong. the ad in question ran in 1983. this is the part where i would triumphantly embed the ad from youtube, except that the governmen…